2019 I thought was going to be my year. I started it out with a boyfriend who I had been with for 4 years and was very much in love with, just got myself a new job and we had a puppy. I thought I had it all. Then Febuary arrived and he broke up with me. I had to move out my house back in with my parent resulting in me having to leave my job. My life flipped on its head. I feel like I have lost my indepence and my life. I am trying to get my life back. I am job hunting every day but its starting to feel like no one wants to employ me and people keep asking if I'm ok. I tell them I am. But I am not.
When I go to bed at night I cry. I want him back. I want to know why he work up and decided he didn't love me anymore. Thats all I go was I just don'f feel the same way. No explination nothing. I want to text and call him but I know I shouldn't because it will make everything worst.
This has also shown me who my friends are. My oldest friends couldn't give a care in the world about how I am feeling. Even though I have stood by them though thick and thin. Surprisingly those who I havent been friends with for long have been there for me, on a daily basis texting and making sure everythings alright without asking are you ok. They talk to me about stupid things trying to take my mind of it.

So now I feel like I'm back to being 18 again, no job, living at home again, no independace.

Where do I start I keep asking myself. When will I feel like me again. When will I get a job. If only I had a time machine or a crystle ball!