Source: American Kennel Club
Finland Deploying Coronavirus-Sniffing Dogs at Helsinki Airport: Finland is in the process of launching a “coronavirus-sniffing-dog pilot program” at Helsinki Airport, hoping the dogs will eventually be playing a major role in screening for COVID-19, with the added benefit that results will be delivered within 10 seconds.

Now, when they say they’re implementing a “coronavirus-sniffing dog pilot program,” does that mean both the dogs and the pilots are gonna be sniffing us? Because if it does, I certainly hope we get a choice about who’s gonna be doing the sniffing. After all, how the hell you supposed to bribe a pilot with a Milkbone Dog Biscuit?

Even so, I do have to admit, this is a rather brilliant idea! I mean, dog’s work cheap, and you get instant “Lab results.” Of course, results aren’t always gonna be 100% accurate. For example, my neighbor’s chocolate Lab seems to be convinced that I have the coronavirus in my crotch.

Anyway, while this may be a great first step, I would suggest that in the future, rather than using domesticated dogs - why not use roaming wolf packs instead? That way, whenever they encounter a passenger who’s contagious and possibly spreading the deadly virus, they simply eat the passenger. Hell, if that doesn’t stop the virus in its tracks, I don’t know what will.

Johnny Robish Comedy