Seat to Fly Into Space with Jeff Bezos Auctions Off for $28 Million: A seat to fly next to Jeff Bezos and his brother in Blue Origin’s very first human spaceflight, has been auctioned off to an unidentified bidder for $28 million. Blue Origin will fly its “New Shepard” space capsule to an altitude of nearly 65 miles, where passengers can then unbuckle from their seats and experience about four minutes of weightlessness during their eleven-minute suborbital flight.

Wow, $28 million for an eleven-minute suborbital flight? Gee, I wonder if that’s for economy or business class seats? Why, Jeff Bezos has really put together one helluva “billionaire carnival ride” if you ask me. And, how comforting for average Americans living paycheck to paycheck, to realize that our tax-dodging billionaires will now - not only be looking down on them from the balconies of their fancy penthouses, but also from outer space!

Truth is, these modern-day robber barons are always on the lookout for new, more creative ways to spend all that extra cash they have on hand - courtesy of all those sweet Republican tax breaks. Now, is it wrong to wish that whomever bought this ticket, spends the whole flight trying to sell Jeff Bezos a timeshare in the Florida panhandle?

All I can say is, for an eleven-minute flight, they better find a pretty damn short in-flight movie. Oh, who am I kidding? They’ll probably run Amazon commercials. Anyway, all of that aside, you have to admit this is certainly the perfect gift for that person in your life who seems to have everything - and yet somehow, it’s still not enough. Behold, the next “status symbol” for the world's billionaire class.

Sadly, I suppose this also means most Amazon customers can abandon their hopes that a ride on Blue Origin will soon become one of the free perks that come with their Amazon Prime memberships. On a positive note, a Blue Origin spokesperson says even folks forced to live on the streets, should be able to watch parts of Blue Origin’s flight - assuming the weather stays clear above their homeless encampments.

Johnny Robish Comedy