Trump Departs White House to Find His Company in Shambles: Donald Trump returns to his company this week, to find it facing an ever-deepening crisis, with key properties bleeding revenue and its bankers, lawyers, and customers, all fleeing the company en masse, due to the Trump name becoming so toxic. Records indicate that Trump is facing more than $450 million in outstanding loans, including $290 million on his Doral golf course and his D.C. hotel alone.

Why, it sounds like Mr. Trump needs to undertake a major rebranding effort, if he ever wants to make a financial comeback. And, since just about every sane person here on Earth is abandoning him, perhaps it’s time he starts focusing on business ventures that match his “supporter’s demographics.” Now personally, I’d suggest he forget about all those fancy resorts, and start a new chain of trailer parks. Why, he could even name them “Trump’s Last Resorts.”

Next, it’s time to ditch all those money-losing golf courses of his, and open up a new red state network of “shooting ranges.” And, to add a little extra incentive, he could advertise that all the targets will feature life-like images of either Hillary, Hunter Biden, or perhaps even that libtard MSNBC logo itself. Hell, if that doesn’t pack them in, nothing will! Why, the possibilities seem almost endless, just like Trump’s legal problems.

Johnny Robish Comedy